Are these terms at odds with one another?  It sure seems so, at least from this blogger’s life perspective.  These terms sure seem like they should work well together, but from my perspective, it doesn’t.

Religion for example.  We have been pretty happy with your church for some time.  I was drawn to the church because of our Pastor.  He helped me see religion in a new way.  Many of our current members came to the church because of him.  We love our Pastor, even though he has been somewhat dark lately and needs to lighten up some.  We recently found out that he and his family would be moving to Arizona, leaving another Pastor in charge of our church. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for the woman who would be taking over for our Pastor when he leaves.  I think she is extremely knowledgeable and very willing to give her new role 150%.  My commitment in me says I have a job to do (I handle the sound systems) and that I need to stay to continue my role in the church.  Although lately, my committment has felt more like an obligation than a committment.  I feel torn that my wife needs my assistance in order to even make it to church on time while I am already at church in the morning.  My feeling is that she needs me more than the church does right now.

My loyalty is at odds also because I am being strongly pulled in another direction to look at other churches and possibly moving on.  This factor tears at me the most.  Hearing that others are already looking for other options outside of our church doesn’t seem to help my decision to stay very much.  Additionally my fears include starting over at a new church, with new people and new expectations.

Finally, my faith says that maybe it was meant to be.  My wife and I had been questioning whether to stay at the church but stayed anyhow, long before it had been made known that the Pastor was leaving.  Does my need to be faithful mean I should listen to the signs and take this as a sign from God that it is time to move on?  Is this really a test from God and am I failing that test by leaving for another church?  I am not sure.  At this point, there is a stonger pull to move on and find a new church to call home, even if it is with a heavy heart and a feeling of guilt, but, time will tell.

Outside of religion, what do you do when you have given your utmost loyalty to someone or something and had faith that the loyalty would be rewarded.  When it is clear that the loyalty will not be rewarded and your faith has been crushed, do you still remain committed?  I just don’t know.  I have recently had many events happen in my life which are challenging these very principles and I do not have any sense of what I should do next.  I guess I will just have to place my faith in God that he will direct me the right way and down the right path.

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